It's gonna be a sad Xmas for me......

Where are you? What are you doing? I missed you dearly and I blame myself. I missed the days when you were at least by my side, for me to hold. Now that we are out into the real world, I feel like we are living in worlds apart. Just 1 pathetic message is all I get from you everyday, and it's not even thoughtful. Im not sure, but is that enough for you? Its obviously not for me, that's why im always telling you all these things. Nothing seems to work, and its really sad.

This is like a typical ending relationship. I can see it coming. The tears are always trying to overflow my eyes, but I can't and don't have the time to. When I told you to have more initiative and stuff, you asked me what should you do? Are you really that silly? Your reasons that it will be hard since we are working is believable. But currently you are not and are you so busy to only ask about me once. When it was the other way round and I was jobless, I would constantly ask about you. Im always the one who initiate. We haven't meet for 2 weeks and I think we might never again, since you will never ask me out and I have given up asking. What is it with you? Are you really that lazy? Am I too loving for you? I think so too. Im a very emotional being and need you very badly. Imagine what my friends would say when I tell them you don't even say "I love you" or " miss you badly" at all to me.

Come to think of it, Im always the one who say these things. And they are important you know, they do make the person feel loved even when they can't meet up. You said that you have grown tired of me "nagging" at you, then what you want me to do, Im not going to let this carry on forever, can't you see its very pointless. You make me feel stupid, as if im harvesting love from a tree, a dead tree. You are always on my mind you know that? I really loved you, yes I said "loved" cause soon it might just turn to hate one day. Please wake up.