man oh man

Watched transamerica over the weekend and it was a nice, heart-warming story. Felicity was hilarious as the transexual while her lost'n'found son Toby is just hot, with several scenes of the cutie baring almost everything *blush*

The actor's(hottie) name is Kevin Zegers. And here are some nice pixie of him ;p..

One little thing

He is a nice old man, with a nice little dog. He will be there every weekend at this particular interchange with his jack russel, and always it's in a different costume. Simply adorable, and kids will flock to it like silly birds, including me. Oh well, it's life in a little town.....

Mr Freedom

Finally, I quit my job yesterday. It was a very sudden decision, and I did not have a back up plan or a new job. So basically, I'm a jobless man haha! Besides adding on to the unemployment rate, I did not feel sad about quitting, just disappointed. I really tried my best to meet their demands, but it's just not enough, even f I cloned myself it wouldn't work. And my eye circles are getting worst! I mean its not a reason why I quit, that would be really silly! Guess now it would be a nice time for me to reaccess my life and hide in some cocoon. Arrr~~~

Break break down

You CALLED yesterday to basically say
That you care for me but that you're just not in love
Immediately I pretended to be feelin similarly
And led you to believe I was O.K.
To just walk away from the one thing
That's unyielding and sacred to me

Well I guess I'm trying to be nonchalant about it
And I'm going to extremes to prove I'm fine without you
But in reality I'm slowly losing my mind
Underneath the guise of a smile gradually I'm dying inside
Friends ask me how I feel and I lie convincingly
'Cause I don't want to reveal the fact that I'm suffering
So I wear my disguise 'til I go home at night
And turn down all the lights and then I break down and cry

So what do you do when somebody you're so devoted to
Suddenly just stops loving you and it seems they haven't
got a clue
Of the pain that rejection is putting you through
Do you cling to your pride and sing "I will survive"
Do you lash out and say: "How dare you leave this way"
Do you hold on in vain as they just slip away

Well I guess I'm trying to be nonchalant about it
And I'm going to extremes to prove I'm fine without you
But in reality I'm slowly losing my mind
Underneath the guise of a smile gradually I'm dying inside
Friends ask me how I feel and I lie convincingly
'Cause I don't want to reveal that fact that I'm suffering
So I wear my disguise 'til I go home at night
And turn down all the lights and then I break down and cry

Meet me

Today, I confronted my inner demons and spoke to my poly ex. Ever since I unblock him from my msn, he would chat with me often, until the recent incident that happened and he stopped altogether.

Somehow chatting with him made me realized why I left him. Yes, oh how he croons I'm still the best one for him, even after all the freaking people he could get to meet and date, from young twinks to older men. It's such an interesting contrast for me, since I don't date much and I only had one other boyfriend these past years. I guess he's searching for something that's not there, which is me. I don't believe this is the way things work, sleeping with everyone to find this "feeling" and thank god I don't feel pissed. Especially how he had a great marathon sex with some kid and he seemed to be boasting in front of me..... like orh cool, what's next?

The same can't be say to the guy I hope to know better, I wonder why he's feeling guilty, I don't belong to my ex anymore in the first place. Gosh, it's so frustrating, like some forbidden love, not that it isn't in the first place but why do I always end up in relationships requiring expert skills??

It's gonna be one hell of a bumpy road ahead but I guess I should slowly work things out. No point telling him in the face that I want him..... what would happen if he tells me he don't feel the same?? I feel so lusty now, urgh gotta resisitttttt.